Dating Someone With Psoriasis
I have been single for some time, by choice really. And I am happy, however, this notion seems to go beyond some people's understanding. The other day, my friend and I were having a chat and she was asked me: "Would you eventually go on a date and if yes, what would you be looking for?"
What a question. I think if anything in life, the truth is, I do not often know exactly what I want. As this conversation progressed, I mentioned that it would be cool to date someone with psoriasis or a similar skin condition.
She could not believe it, and we spoke about it a bit which was really interesting. By no means would I limit myself to a certain pool of people should I decide to start dating again. I went on to explain.
Understanding the challenges of psoriasis
If there is one thing that we all know well enough, it's that it is hard to be understood. The pain, the fatigue, the medication, and all its restrictions can be a lot to deal with. Getting loved ones and friends to even partially understand what we go through, is really really hard.
People who have psoriasis, already get it. Importantly, they have been through so much of the same thing. While we do not all experience everything the same way, when you have been through something the same, you inherently have a better grasp for what it is. What it means and the impact it can have on your day and your life.
Psoriasis is a big part of who I am
My psoriasis may not define me, however, it is a very large part of who I am. It has helped me learn so much, understand, and love myself so much more.
My psoriasis has been the catalyst for change in my life on so many occasions. From eating habits to social habits and the people I choose to keep in my world. This being said, it forms a huge part of my personality and my life, and if you could actually understand that, it would make our relationship that much better.
My goodness, if ever there was a time to have someone who understands, it would be during flare season. For me, flare season is roughly 6 months of the year. You would understand why I cant cuddle for too long or why my skin hurts.
You would probably not take it personally and chastise me later for this. I would not feel embarrassed if I needed help applying cream in hard to reach places. Or if my joints were too sore to move easily you would understand. Not because you feel sorry for me but because you know.
To be frank, I did not even think about dating and my specific needs until this conversation. While I would never judge or restrict myself to this, I do understand why there are disease/condition-specific dating sites and pages.
My friend sat and listened quietly and said "you know, relationships are challenging enough as it is". I did not think about it like this, it simply made sense. You would no longer need to translate a huge part of yourself to your person.
How often do you experience brain fog?