A person deals with anxiety as a doctor waves them over

The Anxiety Of Seeing A Doctor For Psoriasis

I have always talked about seeing a doctor whenever anything seems off. Unfortunately, I just had the worst psoriasis flare in 20 years. I was over 80 percent covered but couldn’t figure out what caused such a flare. But what if I say that even an upcoming appointment triggers my anxiety?

Anxiety about my psoriasis

Well, my friends, it’s not unusual to have anxiety when going out in public. Meeting people who don’t know anything about your condition, and you must repeat the drill of telling them everything about your condition.

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I have empowered myself and have full confidence but still, it gets exhausting at times. But just like that, after a new flare, I felt this tension in my body. A fear of uncertainty, a fear that what if it’s more than just psoriasis, maybe even cancer.

This thought shocks my body, even after all the management and the best possible ways in which I take care of myself. My brain has its way of getting back at me. I get restless, my body feels those goosebumps about what is about to happen.

Anxiety about doctor's appointments

We all know that psoriasis flares come in waves, there are good times and there are bad times too. But the time between my new flare and the appointment with the doctor is filled with so many intrusive thoughts. There are fears and doubts. Even while sitting here, I keep thinking about what it’s going to be like this time. What treatment will they try on me this time?

I am not saying that it is all okay, but let’s be realistic here. We cannot control all of this because we are humans with our insecurities and fears. There are times we can control ourselves but not all the time. There can be twists and turns.

For me, the anxiety to see a doctor happens when I don’t know what is wrong with me. I need somebody who can tell me what is going on, that’s where my doctor and therapist come in.

Second, I am afraid that if my doctor tells me something that has never happened before, like am I getting worse? Is my condition going on to the next level, whatever that might be? What if my body is no longer accepting the treatment?

Coming out stronger in moments of weakness

All of this is my perspective, it can or cannot be the case with you. However, discussing each detail with my therapist does give me hope and satisfaction after every session.

Just like I said before, our brains do have ways but the only thing we can do in this is to not fall prey to these thoughts. There are moments of weakness, but we always come out stronger. (I think.)

After all this time of management and seeking stability, the only thing I have learned best is to know myself. Be aware of my thoughts, and try to find the core of them. It did take time, but getting to know myself more has only helped me to get stronger. I had to understand what my doctor had to say. Why he was saying it, and how I could make it work. Getting anxious before appointments is one thing but giving up on that anxiety and skipping sessions is never a good idea.

Remember, we are not alone.

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