4 Things Not To Feel Guilty For
I'm always looking for inspiration - in books, articles, and even on social media. In fact, I belong to several social media groups to find connection, validation, and, yes, inspiration.
The majority of the groups I engage with are psoriasis-focused. Some of the groups aren't about psoriasis at all but about managing life with chronic conditions. It helps me see what people share, chat about, or struggle with. It can be so validating, and I even aim to help.
Psoriasis with a helping of guilt
Recently, I was scrolling through and stumbled across a group called, Rise Above Epilepsy. They posted about the partnered guilt that comes with managing life with an autoimmune disease or severe chronic condition - it resonated with me.
I do not have epilepsy but felt connected to this post and felt it validated my experience with psoriatic disease. I hope it will resonate with you as well, so let's dive in, shall we?
Having a chronic illness
When I think of psoriasis guilt, I refuse to feel guilty about simply having it. I didn't ask for this. In my case, it was pre-determined when I was born. My dad has psoriasis along with other family members on his side of the family.
For me, this condition is hereditary. I did not ask to have psoriasis - none of us did. Who would ever ask to have a chronic illness? It is what it is. We learn to cope with it. I am not saying learning to cope is easy because it is not. Some days are okay, and others are just challenging.
I had to think about this one for a bit. When a person is covered in psoriasis, it is tough to feel anything but sad or angry. We should be allowed to feel that and, more importantly, express that. We should not feel guilty over expressing emotions while, most of the time, the majority of the time, we do.
It makes it an unhealthy situation when we feel like we have to hide our emotions and our skin. Your emotions are your own. You should not feel guilty over that.
Doing whats best for you
Again some thought had to go into this one. Over time, I learned that doing what is best for me is what's best for my psoriasis. Learning to say no was a big hurdle for me. Of course, I want to accept every invitation or help request. However, that cannot always be accomplished.
When a person learns to say no, it takes a big weight off. Being kinder to ourselves on bad days helps bring the stress level down and ultimately helps our psoriasis in the long run. When we stand up for ourselves, we become the best version of ourselves. We should never feel guilty about that.
Asking for help
A big hurdle for me. Before my psoriasis started, I was a very independent person. I felt strong and determined and that I could do anything I set my mind to. Then my psoriasis manifested and made me feel anything but strong.
My first test in this practice was when a medicine knocked me down so hard that I had no choice. It was then that I learned that asking for help is not a bad thing. I didn't feel guilty about asking for help because I knew I couldn't do it myself.
Not feeling guilty is not easy
No one said it was going to be easy. It wasn't for me either. I had to learn that by putting myself first, I am doing what I have to do to live with psoriasis. You can too.
Living with psoriasis is hard, but it doesn't always have to be complicated. Anything that makes your life easier is a win-win in my book. Even if you apply one concept listed here, you are on your way.
Would you be interested in the following? (select all that apply)
Join the conversation