Oorah - Would It Have Made a Difference?

The year was the summer of 1974. I have never spoken a word of this to anyone in forty-five years. I didn’t have close friends, boyfriends or anyone I could talk too. I was depressed, sad and a broken person at the age of 17. All of this in the name of psoriasis.

When career choices are impacted by psoriasis

It has been 6 decades of me living with psoriasis. There was a time that I would beat myself up because so many of my dreams had denied me as a young adult. We had counselors in school who would talk to you about career moves. They would always narrow it down to 3. I had big plans to join the military, be a police officer or an airline stewardess, I was on a mission to fulfill my life dream.

I first applied to be a flight attendant. I didn’t qualify because I was 5’2 and I believe you had to be 5’3. That didn’t bother me; so what, I was short. My next step was to apply to be a police officer. Again, I was too short at 5’2, you had to be 5’7. I was like yes; I’m going to the military!!

Unfortunately, this too blew up in my face. I took all my required tests, passed them, but when they saw my body was 80% covered in psoriasis, I no longer qualified for the military. This door was shut for good on my career choices. This was 1974, the door to protect citizens was lost and so was I.

Low self-esteem and pity

You could offer me a million dollars and I couldn’t tell you what I did for the next 24 to 48 hours. I was in a fog. I would unknowingly fall into a pity party and stop dreaming for a while. I was alone. I basically had to take a job and didn't have a career path. I had mapped out my life. Why was this happening to me? Being successful was instilled in me at an early age. I knew where I wanted to go. I was motivated and ready to take on the world. I know my life would have been so much different. I waddled in a pool of self-pity and got off the road that I felt was planned for me.

Real anger

Was this fair? Of course not, but life is not fair. What do you do when you are given a hand in life that you can't change? I don’t know. My choices from that point were exactly what they were; my choices. My disease has closed many doors for me, but it also opened some doors. I carried anger around for years, but I knew it wasn't my fault I got psoriasis. It took me years to come out of that funk, but I did. I had to realize that it wasn’t psoriasis that was holding me back, it was me.

Only a dream

Years later, I look back over my life and think about all the people I could have protected and served if I was a law officer, stewardess or be in the military. That was a dream long gone, but my life was not in vain. I get so excited about my life now. My psoriasis was not in vain. The dreams I had to serve and protect will never die. I just took a different path to get there. My advocacy work is something I would never change. I couldn’t understand the denials or the closed doors, but I do.

I will say this, never stop dreaming because it may not come how you think it will. It will be bigger than you can imagine. I’m living my dream every single day.

Dreams do come true

I wake up every day just thankful that even though I couldn’t do what I wanted to come out of high school, but my life with psoriasis was not over. I want people from all over this world to hold on to your dreams and passions. Fight to be your best.

My pain with psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis has allowed me to do things that most people don't dream of doing. I walk into Capitol Hill every year to advocate for this disease like I belong there. I have been invited to speak at several events; like the FDA and at Town Hall Meetings. I blog, do photo shoots, attend conferences, seminars, got to speak in front of 200 dermatologists. I’ve had the Dr. Oz show call me twice but they haven’t picked me yet for a show. I have got to travel to over 35 states to tell my story.

When I look back to 1974 and feel disappointed that I was covered from head to toe with psoriasis and denied some opportunities and they said, no way. I can only say, Oorah because I’m living my best life.